My attempt at world domination fails
So for posterity’s sake, and so I remember the details myself, here’s what it was like to be on — and lose — a Jeopardy! match. If you want the play-by-play, it’s available here, and the discussion of the game is here.
1. Auditioning
I auditioned online. I signed on to their email list, and eventually got an email invitation for a flash-based quiz (their first, to my knowledge), with a specific time and date. It was a fill-in-the-blank test, not like the Google tie-in which has now started. Then they invited me to an audition a few months later, at the Waldorf Astoria. There were maybe 30-40 people (that’s a guess) but it was one of two sessions for the day, and I think they did a week of sessions. There was a little pep talk, a little bit about what they’re looking for, and an video narrated by Johnny Gilbert about the basics of how to play. Then there was a written fill-in-the-blanks quiz. The questions were asked by Johnny Gilbert. Like the online quiz, no grading was done, they just took the papers. Then they brought people up in threes to play a few test questions each, and see what kind of rapport the people have. They’re looking for folks who won’t completely lock up on camera, and who don’t guess at every question. It’s also a potential contestant’s first chance to play with the buzzer. Much has been written elsewhere on this subject, so I won’t go into excruciating detail, but it’s a little thicker than a pen, it’s officially called the “signaling device”, and it’s really the key to the whole game, Final Jeopardy notwithstanding. Anyway, afterwards I didn’t hear back from them until the following year, so it took a loooooong time to get any feedback. Once I did, I immediately said yes, signed the paperwork, and Carrie and I got tickets for LA.
2. The greenroom and studio
The greenroom is actually green. It’s small, with a nice little spread of craft services. We filled out more paperwork, and then finally got to walking into the studio for some test questions. That was a huge moment. It’s cold to compensate for the lights, and the set looks much more 3D in person due to the telephoto lenses used on the contestants. But it’s about the size you’d imagine from watching the show. The scores are above the screen which shows the visual clues, and the cameras that face the contestants are within the wall underneath. The touchscreen panels are hard to write on, the middle one especially. They give you a few chances to practice.
Before going on, contestants sit to the side of the studio audience, but cannot talk to them or even acknowledge the presence of friends or family. We watched all the games before our own, but after their game, contestants could leave if they wanted to.
3. Game play
I started out kind of slow. The Solomon Islands questions seemed very hard for Single Jeopardy, and I didn’t want to go into negative territory right away, so I didn’t guess on anything there. I also had bad buzzer luck at first, though it improved. (Sarah was definitely great on the buzzer, but I think all three of us were able to hold our own) I started to get nervous that I wasn’t ringing in to many of the questions, but the Tom Hanks category really helped me. I was hoping they’d have Joe Versus the Volcano, as I’m a fan.
The contestant introductions flew by, and aside from the credits period, this was really the only time I spoke to Alex. My mind went completely blank as to what I said, afterwards. As for the boast about Manhattanhenge, I hadn’t really looked at the Google results since 2004, so I probably shouldn’t've said that. Luckily, he said “Manhattanhedge” anyway, so after we taped, I made sure I was on top for that. But there was no huge surge in hits to either Wackyneighbor or here, anyway. Plus, now that they’re doing that cross promo with Google, it’s probably good business for them.
The only answer that I got due to study was the Louisiana state flag, because it had pelicans. I studied state mottos, and birds. Seminoles = Florida was similar, but I probably could’ve gotten that before studying. The closest thing to a total out-and-out guess was Chippendale. I knew the time period and that it was named after the furniture maker. It was a rebound question, which gave me a little extra time to consider the answer.
The only one I got wrong (not counting final, heh) is that I guessed Barishnikov for the first Ballet question. I saw the word “defection” and went for it, even though the year raised a warning bell. It was a good opportunity to guess, since no one else had rang in, and it was a low value clue. Marta ran down that category quickly, and I had enough sense to stay out.
4. Final Jeopardy
So, here’s where I really screwed up. I figured out the answer at about 3 seconds before the time ran out, and started writing Benito. Of course, I should’ve just written Mussolini. I had arrived at the answer forwards, where I should’ve arrived at it backwards — start by thinking of important Italians coming into middle age in the 30s, and you’d have it. But I had to figure out Benito Juarez first. As for the betting, I really should’ve bet zero, assuming that I’d only win if all three of us got it wrong. That’s what you’re supposed to do, since a “triple stumper” is more likely than a 2nd place contestant getting it, and the 1st place missing it. But I went with betting everything, and it would’ve been a brilliant thing if I’d figured it out 3 seconds earlier. Such is life.
A few people have suggested that since the category was “namesakes” they should’ve accepted Benito, but I think the question was phrased to clearly mean to name Mussolini.
5. Conclusion
It was a good game, and a lot of fun to be on TV. It would’ve been nice to win, but I’m sure I’ll get another chance for glory down the road, so I’m not sweating it. I’m glad I finished close with the other contestants, each of whom played very well. And at least I got to Final Jeopardy.
However, if anyone has access to a time machine, please email me.
