Top ten tips of ALL TIME!
By 2040, according to a study I just pulled from my ass, 95% of the web will be tips or lists, or lists of tips. So here’s my condensed top ten list of tips.
- Exercise.
- Eat five portions of vegetables a day.
- Wait 30 minutes after the five portions of vegetables before exercising.
- Save 10% of your income.
- When posing for photos, put one leg in front of the other. It makes you look thinner.
- Imagine the audience in their underwear.
- Think about baseball. Or England, depending on your problem.
- Don’t cross the streams.
- Never get in a land war with Asia.
- Be excellent to each other.
That should cover just about it. Am I missing anything?
May 14th, 2007 at 9:00 pm
Good thinking! Some of these are really common tips, but I especially like 3, 7 and 9. 10 was already written in black ink on my office wall.
6 is a bit difficult in my company, there’s a lot of people who, frankly, I don’t want to think about in their underwear. And don’t ask how I know my boss doesn’t wear any.
Now that I think of it, I still don’t get 7. I think I know my problem, but how do I know whether to think about baseball or England?
May 15th, 2007 at 9:56 am
I’d say you want to think about baseball if you’re a little too excited, and England if you’re not excited enough.